(Ahhhhhhhhh ohmigod ohmigod it’s actually here! VOTING ME FOR MTV’s TWITTER JOCKEY TIME IS UPON US TOMORROW!!! And yes, I did throw up a little while brushing my teeth this morning! So help a girl out, and spread the word one last time…)

Twitter your hearts out, love muffins…

Follow @LivitLuvit, my favorite in the @MTVTJ search for MTV’s first Twitter Jockey! #zyncmtvtj #lilu4TJ

(Feel free to get creative, this suggestion is just for your copy & paste convenience. Cause I’m good like that.)

Voting TOMORROW! (ACK!!!) will be via Facebook. You will only get to have to vote once, so make sure we’re Facebook friends!!!

Also, you can just click here to share my plight with your friends on the ‘Book. Love you long time. SMOOCHES.

And now back to our regular programming…

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I have tasted disappointment, my friends… and it reeks of M. Night Shyamalan’s man-undercarriage.

Anyone who’s been hanging around this corner of the interwebs knows the following: A) I am a huge dork, and B) consequently, I am in love with the Avatar: The Last Airbender animated series.

So you can imagine how completely geeked out excited I was when we heard it was going to be made into a movie. Epic battles! Flame throwing! A four-element controlling avatar whose duty it was to defeat the Fire Nation and restore balance to the WORLD!!!!!!!!

And most of all, an unbearably cute flying bison who I was finally going to see ten feet tall. Giant fluffy moo-cow for the win!

So we bought tickets. We bought them in 3-D, because there was no other option…

And then we read the reviews.

The only thing 3-D about the film was the fact that I couldn’t take my glasses off or everything was blurry. Grandma if I do, Harry Potter if I don’t.

Look, I get it. It’s an ingenius way to make it feel like we’re falling into a giant abyss towards a bubbling pool of lava, and hike the prices up 50%. But frankly, if I want to feel like I’m flying over the Grand Canyon or about to be eaten by a Great White, it’s because I’m at the Museum of Natural History trying to convince my family we’re having fun since I can’t take them to our favorite local bar to eat tater tots and yell out the answers to Cash Cab with the other regulars like we normally do on Thursday night.

What?

We found ourselves a block away from the movie theater the night prior to our showing, and very seriously considered attempting to get our tickets refunded after reading Ebert’s and Vanity Fair’s scathing-yet-hilarious reviews, but lazy won out and we decided instead to just bring flasks make the best of it.

Honestly, it wasn’t as bad as we were expecting. But since a couple reviews called it “an abortion of a movie,” that’s really, really not saying much. (Also, the last movie I saw in the theater was SATC2. So, you know… lowest bar EVER.)

They erased all traces of East Asian descent from the characters, and replaced them with child actors so awful they couldn’t convince a dog to come with bacon in their hand. They blatantly changed the pronounciation of the main character’s name. They left out and changed and added things to the storyline that any good dork lover of the animated version knew had no place being there.

But through it all, I sipped on my vodka/HiC and I thought… “At least I’ll get to see a giant Appa, the flying air buffalo!”

(I’m easy to please.)

But. BUT.

When I finally did see Appa’s face… oh, how tragically disappointing. It looked like a hobbit woman and Hagrid had a love child that fell out of an ugly tree and hit every damn branch on the way down.

The adorable Appa I've come to know and love looks like this...

M. Night's abomination looks like this. (Short bus not included.)

These pictures perfectly embody what was done to this adorable little television show, this sweet and heart-wrenching tale where you couldn’t help but cheer for the lovable characters on their interesting and engaging journey.

They took my beloved cartoon… and they gave it a lobotomy.






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