Comments on: Solicited Advice Welcome

By: Lucy

Lucy — Sat, 06 Feb 2010 12:46:49 +0000

I can tell you after 22 years of marriage that unfortunately for you things will probably never get better. Your husband is going to have make the hard decision NOW to let his sister know that even though you made a mistake on your blog, you apologized, you thought she would never see it and what she did WAS directly to your face and he should make it clear he will not stand for it. My husband can tell you he wished he did that from day one. I took a lot of crap from my Mother in law and Sister in law for 21 years. Always trying to keep peace. They knew this and so they continued with all their remarks and even some scenes in front of my family. My husband took a stand after 21 years and it shocked his MOTHER. He received a letter from his parents, HIS PARENTS MIND. Disowning him. Can you believe it??? How do you disown your child???? Anyways, your husband needs to make the stand now or your sister in law will be a problem forever, trust me and then it will end very badly.

I probably gave you way too much information (LOL)

Good Luck!!!
.-= Lucy´s last blog ..A REALLY Good Fire! =-.

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Tweets that mention Solicited Advice Welcome | Livit, Luvit -- Topsy.com — Thu, 04 Feb 2010 19:44:44 +0000

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By: BigMamaCass

BigMamaCass — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 23:21:37 +0000

I think you have to invite them. Just be the bigger person. (That that you aren't) and hold your head up high knowing that you did the right thing even though they are the assholes. Prove them how wrong they are! .-= BigMamaCass´s last blog ..Things I have learned from my Toddler #5 =-.

By: Erin

Erin — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 06:28:10 +0000

I would invite them. I would also try to continue to mend the relationship both before and after the wedding. They are family. For better or worse, they are also now your family. The same way you feel bad for hurting their feelings (via the blog), they may too feel bad for how they reacted. Or maybe with time. Regardless, in the future, the relationship with family will be more valuable than the anger over a few heat-of-the-moment words.

By: casey

casey — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 02:50:57 +0000

man, i know all about wedding drama, firsthand. my in-laws were a total nightmare, especially my mother-in-law’s identical twin. but, nobody cares about me, this is about you.

and you have to invite his sister.

i know, i know.

it IS your wedding day. but honestly, a wedding is a lot of other people’s day, too: your parents, you, all the people who took the time, money and effort to come witness your special moment.

the good news is, you’ll be so caught up in the events, that any of their bad behavior won’t even be noticed by you. i can promise you that any stunt they pull won’t detract from your wedding high. and if they DO behave like turd burglers, rest assured that everyone will simply think, “gee what turd burglars” and not, “gee, what a declasse wedding!”

you have to live life with no regrets. you don’t know what the future holds and there could come a time (in the not near future) where you and your sil don’t despise one another. in which case you’ll feel bad she wasnt there. and even if you never get along, you will know you took the high road. if something tragic were to happen, your husband might never forgive himself for not having her there.

it’s much easier to live in the moment and say she can’t come but i implore you to think long-term. grandma WON’T understand, either. people from an older generation have different ideas about what to tolerate in regards to family, etc.

i promise you will not regret inviting her, though you may regret not inviting her.

p.s. i don’t read this person’s blog (the hint was lost on me if i do, but i’m not part of the in crowd, lol) but i have to think that maybe the reason she got so pissed over whatever you wrote, is because she knows there’s an element of truth to it!! some people are impossible to please so you just have to take solace in knowing you did your best to facilitate a recovery. besides, you might invite her and have her not even show, further proving what an asswipe she is.

By: yourstrulydear

yourstrulydear — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 01:28:49 +0000

don't invite them. its your day, not theirs. so your grandma might get upset, i'm sure she would understand if you really wanted to explain to her why. but really, it isn't her business, you know? they arent happy for you, therefore they shouldnt be entitled to come, simple as that. .-= yourstrulydear´s last blog ..are you watching the grammys too? =-.

By: MinD

MinD — Tue, 02 Feb 2010 23:59:39 +0000

I say invite her and put the ball in her court. If she’s that opposed to you guys as a couple, she won’t attend… Or she will anyway, but being the bigger person and inviting her is probably the way to go.
.-= MinD´s last blog ..37 years. =-.

By: hillary

hillary — Tue, 02 Feb 2010 23:21:12 +0000

Ugh – family drama sucks. If I were in your position, I’d invite the bitches but I’d seethe about it.
.-= hillary´s last blog ..Your Science Is Breaking My Heart In Two =-.

By: emily

emily — Tue, 02 Feb 2010 22:24:47 +0000

Oh, and good luck! Have fun celebrating your love regardless. .-= emily´s last blog ..it's not you. it's me. =-.

By: emily

emily — Tue, 02 Feb 2010 22:24:01 +0000

Then it sounds like inviting them would be a good thing. Smile and make nice with them (curse them in your head) and hope they show their bad side in front of Grandma, but not the other guests. Then have security whisk them away. .-= emily´s last blog ..it's not you. it's me. =-.