Sorry. The “aughts” was just such a great name. It’s going to be hard to let go.
Anyhoo. I think resolutions are for quitters, or something, so I’ll be doing these MY WAY.
Which is, of course, totes different from the way I ever do anything else.
(B, I can hear you laughing.)
My (Not-So-Resolution-y) Resolutions.
1. Start wearing more bling.
I’ve never been good at wearing accessories, be it of the sparkly/shiny, nail polishy, or badass hat/scarf/insert other French thing here. I HAVE them, it just never occurs to me to WEAR them. Matching is hard, yo. Most mornings I’m just trying to remember to wear a bra and some mascara, never mind make sure I have my brown watch on with my gold earrings, or whatevs. But I could probably stand to look a bit more, ahem, put together.
Either that, or start working from home and never, ever wear pants again.
God, option two sounds GREAT.
2. Call my sister more.
She’s pretty awesome. And she’s the only one I’ve got. And she gives me MAD SHIT when she calls me and I don’t answer and then email her back a month later with a link to some tardy cat video. I know, redic. Fine, woman. I will call you every damn day and ask you alllllllllll about your JOB SEARCH (holla? Anyone in Beantown hiring a genius, incredibly funny 23 year old?) and your LOVE LIFE and your BOWEL MOVEMENTS until you’re screening my calls because you don’t want your friends to hear me yelling about your stools. So there.
Love you mean it.
3. Never, ever, ever drink Firefly sweet tea vodka again.
No, really. NO, REALLY. I am still hungover from Saturday. That stuff rips me up. Firefly going in, FIRE coming out. Just sayin. *dies of death*
In fact, I think I may take January off from drinking, in honor of both shrinking my ass, and this awesome Scottish dude I used to work with in a Maggiano’s who always did it “just to make sure he still could”. I’m pretty sure Scottish dudes are wise, or something. Especially ones with as many awesome “this guyyyyyy!!!!!” jokes as he had.
4. FOUR? Whoa, whoa, whoa, little overachiever. Let’s take this slow. Mama’s still hungover, remember??
Happy New Year, lovers.
P.S. Did you vote for me yet in the 20SB Bootlegger Awards? You totally can. Til Sunday. I won’t even get mad. Swear.
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I solve the whole “matching” issue by only wearing one piece of bling at a time. Just as long as it’s ginormous. ;p
Hear that, B? coughcough
Have you tried the Peach Sweet Tea flavor yet — I was mad hungover from it on Sunday — apparently there is a raspberry one as well. Happy New Year!
I dunno, I kind of think it’s sweet enough as is. I AM DONE WITH IT however so it doesn’t matter anyway.
I’ve been in denial that alcohol has calories, but I’m trying to just drink wine, because wine is good for you — bottles at a time.
This is why I heart your face.
Happy New Year Lilu! I hear you on the Bling thing. I attempted to put on a necklace the other night and gave up because it took too long. Maybe when I have more time….
Right?? All the… clasping… and fixing… and hair-getting-caught-in-ing… it’s EXHAUSTing.
Love Firefly, but my husband has the same problem you do with it.
My stomach loins are ANGRY.
Happy New Year! Hope that hangover goes away soon. I have no concept on how to match blingy accessories either!
Boss isn’t here… it’s looking like a short kind of day.
Happy New Year!
The Firefly was too much for ya? Yankee.
Good luck on the rest of your resolutions though.
We had a good year, me and the ‘Fly. I just can’t hang anymore.
Wait… accessories are supposed to MATCH something? Huh… who knew?
HA.
ditto Hope. and I wanna be invited, so I can bring Firefly as a gift.
Well, I mean, if you’re going to put it right in FRONT of me…
Don’t worry about brown and gold or other stripey accessories. After all, truly creative people do weird shit all the time, right? Only this time, you do the creative bit so much gooder.
Hahahaha LOVE IT.
I’m also doing the Beantown job search, apparently kick ass jobs for 22 year olds are hard to find.
Sad face. It’s rough out there, kiddos.
You forgot ‘totally use the word ‘aught’ more in sentences.’
Word is awesome.
RIGHT?!
I’m not very blingtastic myself. I’m like you, have stuff but never wear it. I’m too lazy..I like simple clothes. =p
“Lazy” is definitely the right word. But I like “simple” better. I’ll go with that.
Dude, totally feel you on keeping family a priority in 2010. Although my sis and I hang out so much that I start missing her after two or three days. I could do with calling my mom more often, though.
And dude. Dude. While you’re gettin’ smart/funny Bostonian 20somethings jobs, how ’bout you put me on the list after yo’ sister? Ooh, or she and I could open a cupcake bakery together. HIJINX.
Ooooo. She actually is an excellent baker AND I GOT HER THIS APRON FOR CHRISTMAS. It was meant to be!!!
Hooray for more bling!!!
And I think you may have found the only wise scottish dude who ever existed… Because most of them ain’t! (All of my exes for a start…)
He was freaking hilarious. And probably the reason I stayed there for a year, because that place BLEW CHUNKS.
I’m with you on the accessories thing, maybe I’ll try it too!
Woot!
I stopped wearing earrings out of laziness and I just noticed yesterday that earlobes are gigantic. They need to be covered up with earrings! I’ll never not wear them again!
Oh, GREAT. Now I’ll be earlobe-self-conscious too. THANKS A LOT.
xo
I like #1, option two (working at home, sans-pants). I think that’s a BRILLIANT IDEA and if you figure out how to land a job like that, you let me know.
Also, I think I will steer clear of this Firefly stuff. Sounds like something I totally couldn’t handle being that I’m tipsy after 1 margarita. (LAME.)
It is insane. TRULY.
Love the bling. The world would be a better place if everyone did that.
So, so true.
The look more like objectives or goals rather than resolutions
Good luck!
MY WAY, I said. Don’t judge.
5. Use “diarrhead” in at least one post a week.
That is all.
xoxo
You are such a cunning linguist, my dear.
(tee hee)
I don’t accessorize either…who has the time!
I’ll take “sleep” over “choose necklace” any day.
I have, and do, take a few days off to prove that I still can, but a month? *blink* The mind, she boggles.
Happy New Year! And bling it up, Chica!
Well, with a few choice exceptions, like Lexa’s bday and a friend’s engagement party. But mama needs to detox. Hardcore.
Happy New Year!
I like to make resolutions as needed. But I did make a to do list for this first month of the year. No drinking for the month sounds good to me. Does that mean you get to have some other vice in it’s place?
Ooooooo. Consider THAT seed planted. Hahahaha…
If you have a house party again, I’m bringing over a bottle of Fire Fly.
You know you want it.
Sigh… I am POWERLESS to its pull.
For some reason, scottish dudes just make me think of sex. You said scottish dude and I missed the rest.
He would have had about five witty comebacks for that one.
Resisted the urge to make some kind of “I’lllll call your sister” joke.
I’m maturing!
Suuuuuuuuuuuuuuure…
I work at home and I still wear pants everyday. It’s too mother fucking cold not to.
Fucking weather. FUCK YOU.
Ok. I feel better.
Happy New Years.
HAHA. Thanks. Mostly.
i took a month off from a LOT of things, and i feel very “centered” – yanno, like my chi and shit.
who am i kidding? it’s the same. and rumor has it there’s a mango-type flavor of firefly…
SHHHHHHHHHH. NOT HELPING.
I’m on a month long cleanse of no booze and no sugar. I’m still cringing when I vaguely recall my behavior Christmas night….
I’m more of a salt freak than sugar. But I am NOT giving up my French fries.
That’s hilarious. I hate New Year’s resolutions too. I never do them. I said this on someone else’s blog: It’s like saying you’re going on a ‘diet’. As soon as you say it, you go right into a store and buy out their section of Ben & Jerry’s. Self-sabotage.
As for #1- I wake up at 4:30 to commute to DC and get to work by 7:15. I am lucky that I remember to put on pants at that time of the morning.
#3- Firely Vodka tea is the Devil. I warned everyone I know of my experience…trust me, it wasn’t pretty.
I think it’s just kind of lesson a person needs to learn for themselves. Like potty training, or not shaking hands with homeless people.
Definitely with you on the bling bling. Talking more to your sister is always a good thing.
Truth!
Just to make sure you can. I think that’s a fabulous idea. Because when I wanted to – I didn’t know I couldn’t.
I solve the accessory problem by just putting it all on at once. Then people tell me I look stupid and I take it all off and tell them I’ll try again next year.
But I bet they look great with all your socks!
You’ve one-upped me with the whole mascara thing. Still can’t remember to put that shit on every morning.
Life is hard. So very.
Don’t wear pants ever again, but still go outside your house. You’ll get new friends. Creep friends, but new friends nonetheless. And beggars can’t be choosers.
P.S. I voted the $&#@ out of you for the awards.
*LICKS YOUR FACE*
Thanks, hon!
Ohhhhhh, Firefly. Yea, that’s all I got on that one.
Also, I’m with you on number 1 fo’ sho.
Le awesome.
I work from home, and am usually sans pants. I take great pride in matching my slippers though…
And there’s a pocket square in your pajama breast, right?
Nooooo!!! Don’t give up on Firefly!!!!! It is just way to delicious. I won’t be mad at you if you completely fail at that resolution.
Oh, don’t worry. I have good friends. So they’ll make sure there’s no way I succeed.
I’m gonna wear more bling too, I decided. I got these pretty earrings for Christmas and I used them right then and there to re-pierce my ears so I could wear them. Lots of blood. Still pretty though.
Sure. Now they’re just more, um, abstract.
Maybe if you wore more bling you could totally not wear pants to work. Might take the attention off the fact you’re sans trau…just an idea
If only it wasn’t such a LEGAL-Y place… it just might work.
january off of drinking? ha! hahahaha!
Shhhhhh. It could happen!
You used to work at Maggianos? Were you a bartender? Hostess?
I’m good friends with their business director (I worked at Brinker’s Dallas office when we bought them from Rich M.).
Bartender in Durham, NC. Them’s were the days…
Rachel Reply:
January 5th, 2010 at 8:06 am
Shut UP. Did you work at Southpoint?! I have been to that Maggianos MANY times, and used to work at Firebirds right next door. Its like we are supposed to be friends.
YES. And I had many, many friends who worked at Firebirds and Cheesecake. I was at the Magg for a year and then Champp’s for nearly two. LOVE.
Rachel Reply:
January 5th, 2010 at 1:20 pm
I love Champp’s… and I am going to Southpoint on Thursday because I think I am the only person on earth who prefers it to Crabtree. At the risk of saying something predictable, its a SMALL WORLD.
SUPER. If Rich or Josh Bone the bartenders are still there, give them a Big Fat Hug for me.
“FIRE coming out”
I don’t think we would want video but some audio of your thoughts at the time might be interesting.
Did you… did you just ask to hear me poop?
I think we’re done here.
Can I get an “amen” on the working-from-home/no-pants job? I declared yesterday no-pants Sunday and it was an overwhelming success if I may say so myself. If it makes you feel any better, I left the house today in mis-matched knee socks, forgot to put on a necklace, watch or my wedding ring and had to put on my makeup in the car while sitting at stop lights. I really think that working from home is my only answer.
I joined it without even knowing it! No-pants Sunday FTW!!
How about sending those fireflies here? hahaha. Boozing up sounds so good for me now that I have more free time and look out for internships while waiting for graduation
send em here 
ps. blinging it out isn’t that hard. I’m all for cute necklaces
Another reason my sister is the best. She got me this for Christmas. ROCK.
All great resolutions. Hangovers tend to lead to a few resolutions each year.
A freaking men.
if it wasn’t for my sister gchatting me every single day i wouldn’t talk to her nearly as enough as i should.
I wonder if she can get Gchat on her new Droid…
Firefly+club soda/or seltzer = much better morning after! A christmas gift from me to you. And I didnt’ get people much this year!
I dont like resolutions either. So might as well make em easy!
Keeping the bar low- works for me!
I have no idea what this firefly sweet tea vodka you all talk about. True story. And I consider myself a professional drinker, but never had it or seen it in my life.
WHAT. I guess it hasn’t made it out to Cali yet??
http://www.fireflyvodka.com
I have yet to try the Firefly sweet tea vodka. I went to look for it but my favorite liquor store didn’t have it and I haven’t found it since. Maybe that is a good thing then? I definitely do not like fire coming out of my ass.
I’d offer to send you a bottle, but it took me three tries to sneak a bottle to Sharky through the Post Office.
They are wily, those post-people.
mmm. firefly. i can take about a 1:7 ratio of firefly 7 being for water.
tmi re mascara and bra: i don’t even fill out an A cup so i only wear a bra when i want people to think i have boobs.
That 1:7 ratio sounds just about right. Too bad I was drinking it straight.
Me < --- idiot
Wow!! Excellent New Year’s Resolutions…I have been think about taking some time from drinking too. I have cut back dramatically..It is painful but good for me
But my new year resolution is actually to give us chocolate. Crazy right?
Let us know how January goes sober!
I will. If it happens. HA.
In my head I’m really struggling with the bling one. It’s not that I can’t picture you all blinged up, far from it, but it is that through a bizarre and unexpected sequence of circumstances involving a 9% beer, a slice of creamy stilton and a freak sailing incident I have always pictured you as a gangsta chick, blinged to the hilt and very, very shiny.
So I had got it all wrong huh?!
I kind of like your image better. Here’s to MAKING IT HAPPEN.
At first I was gonna be all yelly and say NO FIREFLY?????
But then I remembered that picture you sent me and it all makes sense. Of you. Months ago. Not the cat. From today. Which I loved. But I loved the picture of you too.
Umm.
Put some bracelets on.
I’m desperately trying to remember what picture that was…
You remember mascara in the morning? I’m lucky if I remember chapstick.
I have to keep chapstick at my desk so I CAN’T forget it. Sad, I know.
See, those are all attainable. Minus the never drinking Firefly again. That’s just pure insanity.
HA. Touché.
I told you guys not to do the firefly. My vodka-tonic drinking self feels EXCELLENT.
The day you take a month off from drinking is the day I’m in a world I dont want to be in in anymore.
It’s YOUR fault, woman!!
FIRST!
nope.
the “looking put together” is all baby steps. once you master the bra and mascara, move up to earrings. THEN a watch. THEn a watch that MATCHES your earrings. baby steps, honey.
and seriously, i felt fine the next day. i don’t know why you were all dying of death so hard. i was dehydrated for a bit but that’s it.
YOU ARE TWENTY THREE. SHUTTUP.
xoxo
LMAO at # 1. I am the same way. I made this vision board that had a section to focus more “On Myself” — what it should have blatantly said was, “Brush your damn hair.”
I am lucky I make it to work in pants, let alone pants with shoes. Shoes that have style. Or are even my size. THAT’S how “pulled together” I look. So my 2010 goal is to, you know, attempt at least once to look pulled together. And like I wore something on purpose, and not because it smelled like it was probably clean when I found it in the laundry room.
Hahahaha. You had me at “brush my damn hair”.
oh man, Maggiano’s is the best chain food italian around. i miss their fried zucchini and 4 cheese raviolis now that we live in nowheresville.
i digress… i work from home. often without pants. it’s as fulfilling as it sounds.
In all the time I worked there, I NEVER got sick of the Chicken Saltimbocca. A-MAZ-ING.
French accessories like a garter belt? Are those French?
I got everyone firefly sweet tea vodka in their stockings this year thanks to you. Fuck accessories, you’re already a trendsetter!
Hahaha! Now I *know* Santa was good to you!
i definitely vote on more bling, everyone needs more bling. bling makes the world a better place. that and i just really like saying bling.
I KNOW. It’s so fun to say. Like “Fran-CIS-coooo!”
Those seem like a very good place to start. And everyone needs more bling.
TRUTH. I hope Jordan has some already. Ha.
I totes read #2 wrong and was like “call her sister what???” d’oh.
Hope you win them all!!!
Happy 2010 RiLu!
Bling it on.
“Bling it on”!!! I will now be saying that at least a dozen times a day. LOVE.
“Wear more bling” is one of the best Resolutions I’ve heard in a long time.
I thought so.
Now that you mention it, I should start blingin’ it up as well…psh, I have to get up at six in the morning. Ya’ll are lucky I remember my damn underwear!
What’s underwear?
you crack me up, which is why i did vote for you
Love you face!
Yeah! Resolutions are for losers! lol I never make them because in a week I have already frogotten them. lol
Oh, and being all matching, it’s highly overrated.
I am wearing fancy shoes today. One step at a time…
1) I am with you on just trying to wear a bra and some mascara. I call my work look “Fancy Hobo.”
2) No drinking?! I mean, good for you, but DAMNNNN.
Well, maybe “no” means “a lot less”. Let’s not get carried away here.
Damn now I have to actually go out and try this Firefly stuff since it is sooo bad… or you know lethal I presume?
Good luck on the bling…
Lethal to the max. But DELICIOUS. Good luck…
I’m sticking with “pants are for suckers” for 2010. Although I’m going to need a LOT more dresses if I plan on still showing up for work. I’m not sure no pants is what my boss meant when she said “more professional dress.”
After that taco incident, I think I’m liking this No-Drinky January idea. Errr, the rest of January.
Right. The *rest* of January. That is key.
I’ll be anxiously waiting for a call about happy hour on Feb. 1.
You get me. You really get me.
flipflopsintherain Reply:
January 4th, 2010 at 4:38 pm
WHY ARE ALL THE COMMENTS SUDDENLY IN ITALICS?!
(that probably was an unnecessary reason to yell, but i’m binge coffee drinking this week.)
LiLu Reply:
January 4th, 2010 at 4:43 pm
FIXED. FIXED. SORRY.
Hahaha.
I can’t think about booze right now without dry heaving. Scottish men are brilliant, I can vouch for that….scotch, not so much. Happy 2010, lover.
Scotch is right up there with Firefly as one of the “DANGER LIQUORS”. Truth.
I haven’t tried that Firefly drink yet and I most definitely will not now. I think those are great resolutions, especially the bling. It gives B an excuse to buy you MAD jewelry. Like from Tiffany’s and such. Good luck !
Oh, you think? My mind hadn’t gone there at all. Not in the slightest.
I went over to vote but I had to join something and I’m not a joiner. So I’ll just pull for you on the sidelines. Rah, Rah, Rah, GOOOOOO Lilu!!!!
I’ll take it.
I resolve to stop making so many resolutions. Except for quitting smoking. Especially since, y’know, I’ve been saying that I haven’t smoked since June. Le sigh.
“Been saying” and “doing” are practically siblings, they’re so in the same family. No biggie.
Gosh, I’m still hungover from Christmas….or yesterday, I can’t remember. Booze free January sounds like a great idea (I can still see your dancing elves when I close my eyes)
Dancing elves! I want one!
i’m thinking you’ll get engaged in 2010 and i can promise you that you’ll never forget to wear that bling!
HA. No, I think I could manage that much.
I tend to put on a shirt and forget my bra until I’m about a minute from running out the door.
This is what I’m saying. Life is hard!
Bling. Definitely more Bling.
I concur.
I have been meaning to tell you this: I really want you to know, I ADORE your blog! I wish I had enough time to read everything you ever wrote! hehe Anyway, I put you on my “Must Read” blogroll. Much love and the best to you in the new year! xo
I love you. No, really. Is that awkward? I don’t even care. *SMOOCH*
hi excuse me, the WHOLE MONTH OF JANUARY? i’m having a panic attack for you. maybe that just means i’m an alcoholic. whatevs – let’s roll with it.
That’s what the klonopin is for.
What?
Kiiiind of impressed you were able to pull off humor and profundity while being hungover, but also, this is LiLu we’re talking about so I should have expected it.
Also, this post supports my theory that women hate wearing pants. What is up with that?
One word: FREEEEEEEEEDOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!!!!!
I didn’t drink for, like, half of December, so I think I’ve reaffirmed to myself that I can stop for a while. Plus, I never have resolutions, but I’m going to this year: #1 Drink more wine.
That’s a good one. Wine is good for your heart, I’m told. And whole*heart*edly believe.
gag
Bling it up!!
and tweet pics of it… we need proof! LOL
You know I will.
Okay dollface, love this!!! I wasn’t going to do resolutions, until I asked my oldest to throw away a bottle and she said, “Aren’t we going to recycle?” SO, that’s our family resolution.
My number one resolution is to write down the funny and cute things the kiddos say. Such as, “Mama, where’s that snowman’s balls? I mean, he has NO BALLS. You know, Mama, it’s not funny….he needs SNOWBALLS.”
YES. I think we can all agree those gems NEED to be shared. Haha!
The BEST thing about my move to Vegas is the home office. Sometimes I don’t even shower until like 3 in the afternoon.
Me < --- jealousssssssssssssss.
Hope 2010 brings you much bling… and like the vodka lesson, remember… EVERYTHING in moderation (even bling bling – you don’t want to be looking like Mr T)
What if I talked like him, too? Then would it be okay? And could I beat Chuck Norris in a fight?
I hear that Jesus voted for you. That motherfucking traitor.
Well, we’ve been DMing a lot since he hasn’t been on twitter. We’re tight like that.
It’s so good to know that someone else has the same issues as me with accessories. I should make this a resolution as well. I give up after earrings.
You got me beat.
Haven’t you seen the Text From Last Night about the absolute failure of Sober January? Don’t do it…
I did! Somehow, someone got to my page from that one… still trying to figure out how.
Ah, I work from home….but I DO wear pants. I figure it’s safer that way, especially when drinking scalding hot tea.
Snuggie, anyone??
The part about #4 cracked me up. I try to limite my resolutions to three things as well because I just feel it’s more manageable!
I need to accessorize more too. I have the stuff, just don’t always use it.
Three is more than enough. If you want me to even REMEMBER them.
Did you and B get engaged? Did you?
HA.
more bling, ha. that’s totally badass.
Why, thank you.
Dude, accessories rock. It’s amazing how much they add to an outfit. Sometimes, I need to watch myself from getting carried away with wearing TOO MANY accessories, especially the scarves and dangly earrings. =p
As Carson Cressly says; always take the last thing you put on off.
That would be awkward for me. Seeing as the last thing was (hopefully) pants.
I got my bling on!On my nose-just screwed it in.Now I can hang with the cool kids too!:D
And thats all the bling I got on me!
Badass.
Girl please! Who do you think you are kidding? You cain’t shit a shitter! Just sayin’.
You are soooooo not going to quit saucing it for the whole fucking month of January. There are 31 days for crissakes!
Oh…before I forget, Happy New Year.
Love!
To you as well, my dear. <3
I’m 20 in july.but its 2010 so I’m technically,TECHNICALLY VERY 20 right?20sb is not approving my membership
THIS IS SO WRONG:(!!
EVIL!
If you want any help with the matching, just ask. I have like no life and get super excited by accessories-related crises.
Move in with me?
I buy so much Forever 21 crap that it eventually tangles up in my jewelry box, or breaks, and resembles what a $3.80 necklace should look like. I need to wear more bling, too, but I sort of need to buy pieces that last longer than a week.
Firefly vodka is dangerous. Seriously. I would know. It made me hungover for days too.
totally with you on #1 and now i know to never drink that vodka SHIZ.
Happy New Year!
i would love to have a job that never required me to leave my house and/or never require me to wear actual pants.
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