(If you don’t understand the title, CLICK HERE.)
So I told y’all that the kittens got snipped last Friday. What I haven’t told you is how it went down. Since I was almost in tears twice, it’s bound to be a funny story, no?
Let’s DO it.
When we got the little hellions cuties, Homeward Trails informed us that a) they needed to be fixed by the end of August and b) the Washington Humane Society would do it for just $45 a pop. Okay, great. So July rolls around and I start calling for an appointment. TWO WEEKS go by and I hear nothing back from my voicemail… Until one day at work when I see a missed call on my quieted cell. AWESOME. “We’re very busy,” it says. “Please call back to leave a new message.”
Fuck. Me.
So ANOTHER two weeks goes by with no word. I’m about to just eat the greater cost of taking them elsewhere when, last Tuesday, I finally see a random 202 pop up on the cell. “HELLO!!!” I yelled as my boss watched me leaning towards the window for maximum signal strength. (I am nothing if not professional.)
The cat-snipping lady gives me very explicit preparation instructions and all I can say is “yes ma’am!”. The kids are almost 6 months old at this point, aka the BANGABILITY ZONE. I’ve already seen Murray’s rocket once. Time is of the essence, people.
So, when she says Friday is available, I say how high. And also, YES. Sure we have the happy hour that night, but I figure I’ll drop them off before work, B can pick them up at 5, drop the DRUGGED and hopefully sleepy babies off at home, and all will be right with the world.
Especially since there will no longer be the danger of banging.
The Thursday night before, we have a little wine. B asks me how I’m going to get them to the snippin’ place two miles away, especially with two cat carriers in tow… and no car. Now I’m not sure, but I believe the metro frowns on livestock, since you can’t so much as open a soda down there without getting yelled at by a dood in a reflective jacket with a Napoleon complex, so I say I’ll take a cab.
“Do you have cash?” he asks, knowing that I have just received a new debit card but am waiting for the separate piece of paper in the mail that tells me its randomly assigned pin.
“No… I’ll just call the bank in the morning and have them change it,” I say.
“You should probably do it now…” he says. Very maturely, I inform him that I don’t FEEL like it and will probably end up dropping F bombs on some poor lady because such is my hatred for all things customer service.
And so the fateful morning arrives. Let me give you the play by play…
7 am: wake up, curse the alarm, the gods and the cats for stirring my precious slumber.
7:10 am: get up, get everything packed for the cats and happy hour, cleanse and beautify, probably curse a lot and send a few angry tweets. (This is standard.)
7:40 am: call BoA, who informs me they CANNOT change my pin, only a store can, which don’t open til 9 and DOESN’T DO ME MUCH FUCKING GOOD since I have to be at work by 9. Asshats.
7:45 am: in my morning haze, decide that I can just run to the grocery store and get cash back! I am a genius!
7:55 am: arrive at the teller with ketchup and tobasco in hand (priorities, people), swipe my card…
AND REALIZE THAT I AM A FUCKING IDIOT BECAUSE OBVIOUSLY YOU NEED TO PUT YOUR PIN IN TO USE A DEBIT CARD FREAKING ANYWAY, YOU UTTER MORON.
8:00 am: frantically bombard B in bed and tell him I need his debit card. Run to the ATM a block away chanting his pin loudly enough for anyone to a) hear and b) mug me and then use. Take money out. Sprint home, call a cab, stuff the beasts into their cages carriers, go outside to my stoop.
And wait.
8:15 am: cab finally pulls up. I have to have the cats at the snippin’ place by 8:30 and I am officially Freaking Out.
So is the cab driver when he sees me running at him with a yowling feline in each hand.
I stuff myself into the car before he can drive off. He glares from me to the cats to me, and sullenly says, “It’ll be a dollah for EACH ONE A THOSE.”
Great. Fine. STELLAR. Thank you, my good man. Let’s fucking GO.
8:25 am: the cabbie is trying to take a shortcut on some back roads in Southeast. Suddenly we come face to face with what is clearly marked as a ONE WAY STREET. I quickly look down and play with my Blackberry so he thinks I won’t see as he checks for coppers.
He guns it down the one way, takes a left and we’re there. I run up to the very tightly locked steel door, and knock.
Nothing.
I knock firmly.
Nada.
I POUND ON THE DOOR WITH EVERY OUNCE OF STRENGTH IN MY WEAK UPPER BODY.
Static.
I run around to the side door marked “Deliveries Only” and pound just as hard, desperate to see human movement of any kind. Peering in the windows, I see cats draped all over an office.
Creepy, but unhelpful.
8:30 am: I dash back to the main door as the waiting cabbie shoots daggers at me from across the street, and bang on the door with both fists for a solid minute. Mid-thrust (TWSS), it finally swings open, and a teenager with dreds is glaring at me as I wipe the definitely-not-tears-of-desperation from my eyes. He eyes me warily as I fill out my paperwork, wish the babies luck, and leave them to their fate.
On the bright side, I was 15 minutes early to work.
On the unbright side, the process of “picking them up” took B three hours, at which point they informed him the cats had to be kept separate all night (in case they ripped each other’s stitches open) and fed pain meds every 30 minutes. (INFORMATION I COULD HAVE USED YESTERDAY!!!!!!!)
Which meant HE couldn’t go to the happy hour at all, and I had to leave at 9. (Hence the second almost tears.)
But our cats? Are NOT banging.
FTW!
{ 113 comments }
Oh honey…Stupid people!! It sucked that you had to leave your own HH early! But I’m glad the babies won’t be banging now! If you had told me ahead of time, I would’ve given you a ride!!
Love you!
.-= PQ´s last blog ..Bring On the Rain =-.
That’s why I always carry a multitool. Never know when I’m going to need to fix a cat.
Although for the first 50 cats, fixing is a relative term. Read, they all died. But good news. I’m really good at it now, and the local chinese restaurant gave me 50 bucks for all those dead kittehs! That’s a buck a kitteh!
Awesome!
.-= Mike´s last blog ..Jail Time =-.
Damnit! My comment didn’t save. Maybe it was because it was anti – cat.
Anywho.
If your two kittens did it, would the baby kittens be all inbred? You should have let them have a litter. Maybe made a little mobile hom for the kitties and let them drink moonshine and dress up in white and burn crosses or whatever it is that inbred people do.
.-= Mike´s last blog ..Jail Time =-.
Yikes. Public transit with cats is always a pain, although at least here (Halifax) while they may frown on it, they still allow it. When I took Salty Bob to get his, uh, salty bobs off, he was in and out in about 2 hours… and no pain meds necessary! Although I do blame the castration for the reason he still sounds like a little girl.
.-= Racquel Valencia´s last blog ..I Really Hope I’m Not Pregnant =-.
All our cats over the years got fixed. I have a few good stories about it, but nothing like that! I plan to do a post soon about funny animal stories…
DOUBLE DAMNIT!
Now both my comments are up.
Your blog is fucking with me. livitluvit.com, what did I do to you to try to make me look the fool? WHAT?!?!?!?!?!
.-= Mike´s last blog ..Jail Time =-.
Insane! I would totally ask for my complimentary bottle of wine if I had to deal with that… If the kitties are gonna be all drugged up, I gotta get some, too.
.-= Desiree Aubigny´s last blog ..Pleasing News in Friend Land & Other Oddities =-.
Oh yeah I saw your Tweet about that and felt for you…I really hate taking animals to the vet, I dont see how you can do it without a car! Such is city life I guess.
Hope the little dolls are healing rightly
.-= Kristin´s last blog ..WE DID IT! =-.
“8:15 am: cab finally pulls up. I have to have the cats at the snippin’ place by 8:30 and I am officially Freaking Out.
So is the cab driver when he sees me running at him with a yowling feline in each hand.”
The mental picture that goes with this is truly priceless.
I vividly remember taking my three-month-old kitten to some clinic on Georgia Avenue, courtesy of the Washington, DC Humane Society, and having a similarly hellacious experience. On a day when you’re taking your poor cat to have its balls or ovaries cut off/out, you’d think the Universe would cut you at least *a little* slack.
.-= Hannah´s last blog ..Did you just tell me about your Dyson? =-.
I think you should have not paid the dollah for your cats. Or, if they’re charging for those, then you should have taken them out of the carriers and buckled them each into a seatbelt. Preferably one in the front seat.
.-= Katie´s last blog ..the New Bases =-.
that just sounds hellish. i hate running around frantically, i totally feel your pain. thanks for the recipe yesterday, i am definitely adding it to my arsenal
.-= RachelSmiles´s last blog ..giveaway! =-.
My comment did go up either!
Hope you got a complimentary bottle of wine along with those drugged-out sterile kitties. That’s one crazy adventure in the name of cat birth control!
.-= Desiree Aubigny´s last blog ..Pleasing News in Friend Land & Other Oddities =-.
I have fun imaging B asking for his cat “Axe Murderer”.
Not at all creepy.
.-= Lemmonex´s last blog ..No, No, Thank YOU =-.
Hamster on a piano…
Hamster on a piano…
Hamster on a piano…
Eating popcorn on a piano…
Yes, I am still singing it and it’s your fault.
Glad the kitties and you survived the ordeal.
.-= LA Cochran´s last blog .."You got me goin’… you’re oh so charmin’…" –Britney Spears =-.
Honestly, I thought Kitten Mittens were going to turn out to be some sort of sex toy…. I am slightly disappointed.
.-= Kris´s last blog ..Crop Dusting. =-.
I was going to leave a message about how bad I felt about your horrible morning – then I realized that your cats got their privates mangled and realized it could be worse. What if the cats got you and B fixed?
.-= Narm´s last blog ..Hot Stuff =-.
Sub-question – do you think if you and B were fixed would you become A) the most productive people on earth or B) the drunkest people on earth?
.-= Narm´s last blog ..Hot Stuff =-.
i shall never again bemoan the fact that i drive a mini-van.
.-= elle dubya´s last blog ..Making It Home =-.
What’s wrong with a little interbreeding?
.-= littlemsblogger´s last blog ..Spidey Man and Key Privileges =-.
Sophie came fixed, but Tabitha had to be dropped off for her snip-snip. She actually came with a certificate good for a free spaying (and isn’t that just the most fun gift certificate evah?!) so I brought her back to the humane society from whence she came. They kept her for a few days and when I picked her up she gave me a look that was basically WHAT IN THE BLOODY HELL DID YOU JUST DO TO ME WOMAN?!?
From now on, all of our pets come pre-snipped. :p
Theo and Calvin both still try to do The Banging but they just get really frustrated because a) they don’t understand the mechanics of P2A, b) they don’t have the goods that offer the pay off. Good for them for going through the motions anyway, I suppose.
.-= Ben´s last blog ..I will never EVER be able to have children. =-.
Yeah for no banging! I was worried I’d get to the end of the story and find you asking if anyone wanted any pets!
.-= melissa blake´s last blog ..Things I’ve Actually Said. Like, Really, Actually Said. =-.
Ack! The best laid plans, right? I would totally go to the grocery store thinking I could use my debit card without a pin. Awesomeness.
Glad you survived! How are the kitties?
.-= Mary´s last blog ..Out of the Mouth of Babe =-.
~ Two thumbs, way up, on the stealth check-the-crackberry-so-the-cabbie-can-use-his-cabbie-super-powers-of-inability-to-see-signage and get you there on time. Brava!!
~ pain meds every 30 minutes? What the hell? I’ve never had to go through that with cat. Usually it’s just leave them in the carrier overnight so they don’t hurt themselves as they come out off the gas.
~ and I’m probably going to have to go with Maturity-Fail. just sayin
Yeah, I don’t think you could have taken the cats on the Metro.
.-= Del-V´s last blog ..So call me now! $5 for the first minute, $2 for each additional minute! =-.
Aww, that’s awful. I’m definitely going to make sure all my cats are fixed before I buy them. Poor kitties.
.-= Jackie´s last blog ..I’ll be back =-.
I NEED SOME KITTEN MITTENS RIGHT NOW
.-= miss. chief´s last blog ..a paper on codeswitching and some verbal abuse about the recycling man =-.
OMG, Girl, you were stressing me OUT with your timeline. Whew!
.-= Summer´s last blog ..Raining and Shit =-.
Aww, poor LiLu. At least they’re all fixed and unhorny now! One less thing you’ve got to worry about, right?
.-= Taylor´s last blog ..It Was Mostly Good! =-.
I literally just dropped my dog off to be castrated 15 minutes ago. Now you’ve got me all sorts of nervous about what my evening is going to be like.
Damn those pets of ours. Damn them.
.-= JPP´s last blog ..Sunday Love List on Monday v. 6 =-.
I do not envy you at all.
But can I just say that I’m impressed with all you were able to accomplish before 9am? Nicely done.
.-= Liebchen´s last blog ..A little touch of the crazy =-.
You know I can crochet, right?
Guess who’s getting kitten mittens this year…
.-= Maxie´s last blog ..Tiger Week, Day 2 – Tigers are Cute =-.
I took my guy to the vet and paid wayy too much money for my own piece of mind. He had to stay there overnight and I’m pretty sure I cried. But he’s mostly stopped humping the blanket that I used to refer to as his girlfriend.
.-= Erin´s last blog ..A Lesson in Subway Etiquette =-.
Non-banging cats are the best kind of cats.
.-= Badass Geek´s last blog ..In Which I Grow =-.
Yucky day for you and the kitties.
.-= The Peach Tart´s last blog ..When Vibrating Panties Go Bad =-.
I’d be creeped out giving my kitties to some weird dude who took forever to answer the door. But at least you hopefully won’t have to see Murray’s rocket anymore, unless he just let’s it flop out like Mulli does from time to time for no reason even though he’s fixed.
I usually scream at LB: “Mulli’s red rocket is poking out!”
Lol..
Ps-I still really want to go to Boston to meet you n B, but its two hrs away. =( And that makes me uber sad. Because LB gets outtta work late and we are poor. (Lol)
.-= Nickie.´s last blog ..Fashion Post. V2. =-.
This is all very useful food for thought. I’m gonna call the folks they suggested for me as soon as I’m off work.
Also – YIKES!
.-= deutlich´s last blog ..Reflection =-.
#1-I forking love your posts. They make me laugh. Then cry. Then thank dog I’m allergic to cats. #2-The use of the word ‘asshats’ makes me love you more. #3-I’m pretty sure we were separated at birth and belong together, not sure how I ended up here and you there but let’s not focus on the wrong part of the story. #4-Pretty sure I’m developing an unhealthy crush on you. Just sayin.
.-= Brown Girl´s last blog ..Vacation Recap =-.
A lesser woman might have used some fishing line to “homeschool” it….
.-= verybadcat´s last blog ..Wishes =-.
oh holy fuck, what an ordeal! pain meds every THIRTY minutes?! like, all night long? shit. i didn’t need to do that for cosmo, then again, i WOULD have, had it meant i would never had to see his mantown bits again. that shit freaks me out on animals. some humans too.
Yeah..well..
My new puppy had live worms in her shit this morning.
Try to have chop suey after THAT.
.-= moooooog35´s last blog ..Motivational Filler – Individuality and Determination =-.
Did the pain meds make the kittehs stoned? Seeing that could be worth the “every 30 minutes” dosage schedule! When I got my Pete and Linus fixed (a bit later than I should have and they started humping each other) I didn’t get pain meds for them. Pity.
.-= PeaceTurkey´s last blog .."…I will hold you for as long as you like, I’ll hold you for the rest of my life…" =-.
I don’t remember having to feed Kobe pain killers every 30 minutes. That is ridiculous. He came home, was groggy as all hell, slept for what seemed like 24 hours straight and then was fine! Easy peasy! Sorry your experience was such a crap shoot.
.-= Kellie´s last blog ..When Sturgis Calls, You Answer =-.
Good thing you did too, because if your cats take after their people-slaves (that’s you and B, if you haven’t figured it out by now), you’d be knee deep in litters of kittens before too long!
I love your story telling ability.
I feel like I was there, or that it was some cheesy 80′s sitcom with a narrator.
I is sorry bout your sit-u-ation with the bangin kitties.
You did’s a good thing.. a very good thing.
Also thank you for your comment on my blog.
Someone famous on the interwebs(thats you, over 100 subscribers clearly makes you famous, or infamous)
I wish I could out him, but I dont have it in me..
Until then I will eat lots of cake and listen to backstreet boys songs that describe my pathetic exisitance.
did I mention your hilarious??
OH MY GOD. i just watched the kitten mittens clip and literally was GASPING FOR AIR, at my desk in the cubefarm, because i was laughing so hard. i am now going to watch it 45 more times, thankyouverymuch.
pain meds every 30 mins!?!? wtf! i didn’t have to do that when i snipped either of my kittehs.
.-= Alice´s last blog ..TMI Thursday – thanks, textsfromlastnight.com! =-.
but they’re from the same litter aren’t they? is kitty incest possible? EWWW
.-= phampants´s last blog ..Chronicles of a Half Marathon – Rock ‘n’ Roll Chicago 2009 =-.
I am a little disturbed they sent the kitties home that day — spay and neuters should stay over one night and be monitored for signs of infection. I work PT at an animal hospital — if you have any questions about the little cuties – let me know. Hope they are healing well.
Oooh, “spay days” are such a hassle! (But not as much of a hassle as an oopsies litter, so….). You just perfectly highlighted the very reason all of mine are fixed BEFORE they go to new homes—I’m just nice like that.
But yay for no banging kitties!
.-= inkpuddle´s last blog ..Putting insomnia to good use =-.
So glad your cats are NOT banging! Over here, they like their animals au naturale. I am so sick of seeing animal testicles and “red rockets”. Not a good look.
.-= Brooke´s last blog ..Lithuania: Then and Now =-.
Who knew kitties could bring the drama like that? I’m glad they’ve been snipped and it all worked out.
.-= Lindsay´s last blog ..My Life Without Me =-.
You somehow got a hilarious It’s Always Sunny clip into a post about kitten snipping… genius…
And yes, kittens will bang. They’ll bang all day until you fix them.
.-= Andy´s last blog ..To discuss a Cosmo review: August 2009 =-.
You right well. and hold my attention. and make me laugh. kudos.
it’s too bad the Always Sunny clip didn’t show the end, where frank tells charlie the bang maid is his mother…zing!
.-= Timoteo´s last blog ..The post where I contemplate joining Twitter =-.
my coworker bought kitten mittens – they arrived yesterday. you desperately need some. i hate cats (except yours) and even i think they’re awesome!
.-= cavy´s last blog ..TIGER WEEK =-.
Oh, I really hope I don’t have to go through as much when we get Loki (our kitten) snipped.
.-= Megan´s last blog ..Taking my life back =-.
That’s a funny (and sad) story. I would have cried too – a lot (but I’m special that way). If it makes you feel any better, when my dog went into heat for the first time, my mom made my 16-year old self go to Target to pick up diapers for her. So not only did I look like a teenage mother, but I also got the joy of putting diapers on the poor dog. She got fixed the week after.
.-= Herding Cats´s last blog ..5 Things I Miss =-.
I am so glad I am currently in a place where I do not have to rely on retarded taxis. Too many situations that involve wasted money…
.-= J´s last blog ..Not Enough $$ For Yums =-.
God I need a drink after that. I hope you had a sippy sippy at 9…AM?
“mug me and use me” LOL not funny. NOT FUNNY if it happened to you. A trick bitch, heck yes.
.-= Elizabeth Marie´s last blog ..Sexy Time… =-.
omg, having them get fixed is the worst! love your play by play, you were cracking me up.
i recently had to google ftw, btw:)
.-= hanako66´s last blog ..show me your heart =-.
Ah to be a fly on the wall…or interior of the cab or whatever. Hilarious, thanks for the morning laugh!
.-= Nikki´s last blog ..Bryan the Grouch =-.
Hahahah – probably didn’t end up being worth the savings hey?
When we took Webster in to get neutered THEY were *supposed* to keep him for the whole day, but he hates being in a cage, and he was in the big cage usually used for dogs, so he was backing up to the very back of the cage, running as fast as he could and THROWING HIMSELF into the cage door in attempts to escape!
They ended up calling me to pick him up 2 hours early.
.-= Amber from Girl with the Red Hair´s last blog ..Spending Problem =-.
Oh wow, you always have the best pussy adventures !! That is one crazy morning .. if it makes you feel any better, I feel down the stairs this morning. fuck. i banged my lower back and elbow. ouch. i was holding a cup of coffee. damnit. i was naked under my robe. crap. i was also holding my *clean* work pants. FML.
.-= Aritza, Goddess of ..´s last blog ..Goddess of .. Rami’s gone and Miguel’s back ! =-.
All-o-this and you still had time to Tweet.
*bows and kisses your feets*
.-= LivingWicked´s last blog ..Tuesday’s Great and Wednesday Too =-.
Can I just say..
Before I got my little jamesdean fixed, there was this one time a friend and I saw him sitting on the floor, kind of human like.. Only he was spread eagle. His little peepee was out and he looked around before cuffing it a few times.
Yes, I saw my cat jerk off.
.-= Rebel Mel´s last blog ..Blah blah blah. =-.
How…HOW is there not a camera following you around AT ALL TIMES?
When I took my cat to get him fixed, he stuck a claw so far in my back that the vet had to separate us. I liked him a lot less after that. At least while I was bleeding.
Actually, he was the devil anyway, disguised as a cute little kitty.
.-= shine´s last blog ..This may be the most awesome thing a computer has every generated and spit out at me. =-.
hahaha, poor you! Did you ever see yourself caring for little feline’s? They owe you a bottle of wine!!!
This? Is why I don’t have pets. They may be cute and loveable…but I’ll be damned if they keep me from happy hour.
.-= A Super Girl´s last blog ..Dude, where’s my Internet? =-.
“Bangability Zone” — fucking great!
.-= hiphophippie.com´s last blog ..When to Say, “I Quit” Without Being a Quitter =-.
haha!! “I am nothing if not professional” and the bit about boyfriends chanting boyfriends PIN killed me. Well the whole post killed me! Hilarious! Yeah, but at the time? I’m sure not so much… lol
.-= spleeness´s last blog ..free belt giveaway! And the ugliest clothes on the planet. =-.
FCK. It would be great if I actually read my crap in between answering ph and clicking “submit” so it didn’t sound illiterate. grrr
.-= spleeness´s last blog ..free belt giveaway! And the ugliest clothes on the planet. =-.
Adding this story to the list of reasons why I don’t want cats, along with my allergies to them, their tendency to lick their butts and then my face and my penchant for wearing dark clothing.
You are brave. I would have just let them bang and then used the kittens for experiments.
.-= Cheddar´s last blog ..Worst Blogger Ever Award =-.
dude! that the hell kinda pain meds have to be given every thirty minutes??? that’s the stupidest plan ever! at least it’s over
ps now i’m really curious… was it torbugesic?
.-= mylittlebecky´s last blog ..i have a sewi-us pwoblem =-.
I’m pretty sure the people in the office pod next to mine are like WTF as I had to stiffle numerous outbursts of laughter.
This is the kind of situation only I could find myself in but clearly I have a buddy to share in what seemingly starts off as a somewhat easy task to accomplish that turns out to be walking through the 9 circles of hell for NO reason other than God decided to take a shit on your head today instead of your neighboor!
Kisses.
Just Jack
.-= Just Jack´s last blog ..To Clarify… =-.
Lame. But at least they ain’t hump happy no more!
.-= Jaime | Fast Times´s last blog ..All I do is eat. =-.
This is why I’m happy that when Tatty chanced upon our garden and decided he wanted to move in that he had already had his bits snaffled off!!! The joys of motherhood eh? Hehe x
.-= jen – tsk´s last blog ..First Summer Edition Playlist =-.
What a pain in the ass. At least it gave you a great excuse to randomly insert a well-placed Wedding Singer reference. Very impressed.
And I’ll concede to your hedgehog video, though in cuteness points it’s probably just about on par with the nom nom nom nom nom nom nom video. And yes, I had to type all of those out.
.-= Children of the 90s´s last blog ..Warheads =-.
Eeeeeeek.
I’ve never heard of having to administer pain meds like that! But at least it took and you’ve escaped throngs of mini kitties!
.-= Shop Girl*´s last blog ..Shop Girl Shares Cake Wrecks & Emails from Crazy People* =-.
Wouldn’t it be much more convenient and less creepy if they had an ‘icecream truck’ type operation that went around spaying and neutering pets.
I wonder what music it would play to get the owners to come out running after with their pets?
.-= eric´s last blog ..Plague (Peste) =-.
My little kitty must be one tough cookie or else the vet prescribed some pretty potent pills. She only got one a day for two days following the surgery. And then she’d spit the damn things out. It was a battle to get them to stay in her. Good luck and remember you love the little stinkers!
.-= Miss Scorpio´s last blog ..Food diary aborted =-.
Purrfect, this is a post I need to share with my daughter when she thinks she needs a kitty cat as a pet. I think your love for customer service is very sexy.
.-= egan´s last blog ..It Only Happens Once a Year =-.
Oh man, what an ordeal! You handled it well. I would have had a nervous breakdown at 7:55.
Hope they are healing nicely
.-= The Northerner´s last blog ..Tidbits =-.
Whew. Glad to hear no kitty incest occurred!
OMG, I saw the Facebook updates, but I wasn’t prepared for that craziness! At least the cats aren’t banging!
.-= Britt´s last blog ..Welcome to My World, There’s Such a Lovely View =-.
That sounds like quite an ordeal…thank god it’s over with!
.-= Courtney´s last blog ..WTF Tuesday =-.
oh man that is definitely an ordeal. i can’t believe they didn’t tell you about the after process, so lame.
.-= katelin´s last blog ..Hollywood is hawt. =-.
by the time i was done reading this i was out of breath and sweating.
no kittehs for mandy.
.-= GingerMandy´s last blog ..Help me, guys! (The part where I ask for help is at the end, so read it all, or just skip to the end). =-.
Thank you for doing your part (and making sacrifices even) to prevent Kitteh Incest!
I guess you need a make-up Happy Hour, tho.
.-= MsDarkstar´s last blog ..The no good, very bad day (with a couple of "good things") =-.
Man that was frickin’ hilarious!
Sounds exactly how my day would go if I was doing the same!!!! ….esp with the mature I don’t feel like it …..I settle a lot of my arguments with The Boy using that exact same maturiosity!
I so wish you had no followers so I’d have an excuse to feature you on Diamonds in the Rough!!!!
I worship you a little ….in a cool groupie way….not a desperate slutty way ….*cough*
.-= Catherine´s last blog ..With Hope You Burn Up =-.
I may or may not have cried when I saw Dax’s little bloody paw last Saturday morning. Thinking – what?! I’m leaving for vacation in a week. There CAN BE NOTHING WRONG. I DO NOT HAVE TIME!
.-= k8´s last blog ..Vacation 2009 =-.
I’m glad you have unbanging cats. And hopefully unspraying ones as well. My cat thinks he’s spraying (you know…marking his territory), but he’s not. I got his little kitty man parts snipped just in time I think.
.-= Katie´s last blog ..It’s Not Over Until the Kids Show Up =-.
Keeping cats from banging is a totally noble calling- I’m proud of you for preventing cat sex. You are an American hero.
.-= Jill Pilgrim´s last blog ..A Love Story In Retrospect, Part IV: The One With A Million Photos, And Also Lots Of Xanax =-.
I used to be sad that your site was blocked to me at work. But, alas now I find myself grateful as I’m quite sure I’d fail at the whole “pretending to work” thing each time I laugh my ass off when reading you. I now have my puppy AND you to look forward to when coming home.
.-= Colby´s last blog ..You spin me right round =-.
i love love love the kitten mittens!
LOVE THEM!!!!
seriously!
that and a dog snuggie
i need them both!
.-= l.o.v.´s last blog ..members only =-.
Haha. His “rocket?” We’ve seen Cody’s rocket way, way more than we like. It’s so gross.
But way to solve the danger of banging. September 17 is so close!
.-= f.B´s last blog ..soon, it’ll all be over =-.
Oh, sweetie. At least you two have done the responsible thing for the world and for your cats. And as far as my experience, the pet-snipping thing always seems to be fraught with complication and trauma.
.-= Lisa´s last blog ..The doing of IT =-.
Wow, I SO missed that bit of info in last Friday’s post. I must be on the short blog bus. I thought they were just making noise. I’m an idiot.
“fed pain meds every 30 minutes…”
JFC! Is this the terminal unit or ICU? I never in my life heard of that and I’ve had *counting fingers and toes* 6 cats…
There’s a missing piece to this gem of a story: B getting those meds down the cats every 30 minutes…
.-= girltrueheart´s last blog ..Corporate Screaming =-.
OH NO!
but no banging right???
and poor B, he is a saint. you owe him three extra blow jobs this week.
B, you’re welcome.
.-= alexa – cleveland’s a plum´s last blog ..win your very own cleveland’s a plum t-shirt =-.
Oh My God! What a stressful morning! Im sorry to laugh but you make horrible situations VERY funny to read!
.-= meleah rebeccah´s last blog ..One Man’s Trash, Is Another Man’s Treasure [Or, Another Man's Responsibility To Clean Up!] =-.
Wow, thats a lot to go through just to get your cats snipped. I suggest another Happy Hour!
.-= mandy´s last blog ..Discontent =-.
That sucks… but at least the cats are OK!
Damn, I love living in a small town. You don’t call the vet, you just drop by his place and tell him you need an animal fixed. If it’s small enough you take it to him, if not he shows up about 3 hours later and just does it. For my abused dog from the pound? She felt comfortable here, but would NOT get in a vehicle. I told him, he did it in the garage. Life is so freaking weird in South Texas!
sucks you had to leave your own happy hour early but at least your kitties won’t procreate!there is a silver lining cn u imagine wot their spawn would be like?!
.-= miss rambles´s last blog ..plse be jealous:) =-.
I’m exhaunsted just reading all that. Talking about pets banging.
Our friends had their spaniels over on Monday and Rusty discovered that he does, in fact, have a penis. He followed their female around and generally embarrased the shit out of everyone.
At least your kitties aren’t like mine, they get carsick. They whine and whine and then throw up and shit everywhere, not fun. But, they are still cute. Sorry they ruined your night, but at least you have prevented them from procreating!
Wait, you don’t want cat babies? Or… kitties? Because that would be cute. Then you would be like a grandma. Or a crazy cat woman. Both are pretty awesome.
.-= K @ Blog Goggles´s last blog ..Sponsor intro: Oddly Enchanting =-.
I’m just so happy that most of the shelters out here won’t even put an animal up for adoption until they’re spayed/neutered. So mine were already done and done when I got them. Whew, no bits to remove.
.-= Just A Girl´s last blog ..How (Not) To Get The Girl =-.
I find it complementary that I couldn’t go because two humans were engaged and you had to leave because two animals lost their ability to procreate.
oh my goodness! glad the cats are ok, glad you’re ok, super glad there won’t be a bazillion cat babies running around. the things we do for our animals.
.-= Down and Out Chic´s last blog ..Humpday Spotlight: House of Turquoise =-.
Wow. I greatly appreciated this story because I definitely laughed a whole lot. I do however offer sympathy for the agony and tears it caused you. *hugs*
.-= Katy´s last blog ..The end of the chapter =-.
I showed Big Man the kitten mittens during our commercial break of Rescue Me last night and he laughed his ass off. : )
Yay for no kitty sexing!
.-= Lil’ Woman´s last blog ..Adios Amigos! =-.
Ugh! I am happy you AND the cats made it through that! What an ordeal!
Did you change your site awhile ago? I must have missed it! I just realized today I was not getting your feed anymore. Oops!
.-= kilax´s last blog ..Marathon Training Week 8 =-.
I can’t believe they didn’t tell you any of that beforehand. Isn’t it just standard procedure to explain every detail of the care before the surgery? How rude!
.-= speakyourself´s last blog ..Little life lessons =-.
Haha, this happened to me recently too
.-= Taylor´s last blog ..It Was Mostly Good! =-.
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