The morning after…
Maxie: I saw your cooch last night.
Me: WHAT?!? Who saw? Why?
Maxie: I think just me and Lemmonex. You were outside and sat down in the wet chair so you took your underwear off.
Me: Oh. Well, that makes sense… Why do I have rugburns on my knees?
/scene.
Update: Lemmonex wasn’t kidding when she said she evokes Tawny Kitean. When I heard Whitesnake come on, I immediately shouted “Oh no! But you don’t have a car hood!” And took it upon myself to do what had to be done.
This? Is just how we roll.
{ 80 comments }
Did I NOT SAY you were gonna have rugburns. I am the rugburn expert.
As if its the first time I saw your cooch… I mean we are engaged
I so need to get drunk with you girls.
Note to self – buy stronger binoculars.
AHAHAHAHA!
If I’m in DC this summer, I so want to go out for drinks with all of you.
I’m pretty sure that Britney Spears has had this exact conversation many times.
But replace “me and Lemmonex” with “the whole world.”
This is why you should always wear OICMP Adult Diapers when you go out on the town. It gives you complete protection!
I love the word “cooch” x
Gives new meaning to “hostess with the mostess”, yes?
Great time and great people! Thanks so much!
I had to go and put on my reading glasses.
I was reading “couch” and thinking,huh? LOL
* check yer purse for the soggy knickers babykins *
Why don’t I live in the greater DC area? This saddens me.
Cooch, just that word makes me giggle!
Remind me if I ever go out with you to make sure my “Britney/Lindsay/whatever celebrity whore” is groomed!!
Crazy women. I really wanna meet you ladies.
LOL I love it. That’s definitely a sign that it was a good night
hahahahahahahaha good god i need to hang out with you ladies! lmao
I hate having to put makeup on my knees before I go out. Oh well.
Too funny! That’s how you know it was a fabulous night.
Oh my. Now I feel much better about having abandoned my sunglasses, shawl, and dignity.
Dignity grows back, y’know. Like toenails, or virginity.
Haha!! That’s hilarious. I love how you were okay, once you understood your reasoning.
Lemmonex: B’s kind of pissed he didn’t at least get a BJ out of it.
Maxie: True nuff. At least it was “tended”.
***Liz***: TRUTH, woman. Truth.
Dr Zibbs: My window were wiiiide open all night. In related news, we have a lot of bees in here now.
phampants: PLEASE do!!! Just let us know!
Kristina P: You know what? I feel for her. It happens more easily than one might think…
Gladys: We need to copyright that name…
jen -tsk: Who doesn’t? xo
lacochran: SO glad you guys made it out! Thanks, love.
fiona: Soggy, indeed. Moist, even…
BWP: I curse the fact that you are so far away daily.
Lil’ Woman: Lightning bolt! Lightning bolt!
insomniaclolita: Yes. Yes you do.
Cassie: Oh, it was epic. With or without my panties.
Emily: YES you do!!!
Spellbound: Dude, they are HURTING.
Elizabeth: FabuLICIOUS.
Shannon: Thank goodness for this.
ScribblesNDots: Well, it does make sense. Wet panties are no fun. Wait…
cooch..that’s funny..I haven’t heard that word in a long time. Look me up if you ever come to Florida I want to go drinking with you guys.
Damn, I always leave your parties a little too soon. First I miss a fight, now this. I knew I’d hate myself in the morning.
ACK!!!!! words i hope i never hear from friends or family members.
LoL…sorry i haven’t been around i was out of comission for a bit.
Oh and the last time i was on your blog my computer crashed and burned..lol…so far nothing’s happen so i am blaming the motherboard on my stupid computer! Missed reading ya!
Wish I had been there…but glad to know I’m not the only one in need of a little rehab after this weekend…
AHHHH why did I have school work to doooooo…. UGH.
Where did you put your underwear?
I am so glad I witnessed that conversation. The look on your face was just priceless.
my evening:
me: dude, i got so drunk this afternoon. i had to leave at like 5:30 and pass out.
boss: um, i know. don’t you remember talking to me?
me: …..no.
i think it was all the sangria fruit i ate instead of lunch. that’s my story and i’m sticking to it.
I do so love reading y’all’s (yup, definitely Southern here) recaps after a night out. Never quite know what to expect – in a good way.
cooch….rugburns…looks like a successful night.
teehee, cooch! What an awesomely disgusting word.
Sounds like you ladies had a pretty epic night.
oh man, i feel like we would be great friends in real life.
I actually prefer the word, “Twat.” But, the word on the street is it is nasty. Not MINE–the word.
Well, I hope not mine…
You ACTUALLY MADE ME roll on the floor, laughing my ass off! (Better my ass than my cooch, no?) Rock on, woman!
That’s funny.
Remind me to party with you sometime, eh?
Pfft! They saw your “cooch” and they didn’t post pictures of it on their blogs?
LOL.
Why do I get the feeling that any trip I make to your neck of the woods will ruin the little sanity I have left? Moreover, why does that thought make me giddy?
For the first time ever in my 29, almost 30 years, I was hungover and drunk at the same time after waking up from passing out at home.
THAT is what I call a fantastic party.
y’all ladies are hilarious!
Wow. I mean, sometimes I feel like I missed out on something, but this? Multiply it by 10x.
Thank you for my new computer wallpaper.
Good times. Thank you, thank you. Hope the TP comes in handy. xoxo
This sounds hilarious. You roll pretty heavy. And I like it.
i have rugburns on my knees and i was at my boyfriend’s parent’s house for the weekend, so there’s that.
ahem.
im so jealous you’re all meeting and playing together! call me and we can be wild together- ill be out for my bday so you know there will be shenanigans. xx
God I miss White Snake.
I’m being serious.
Hot girl on girl action always completes a weekend. Only wish I saw it live.
i am heartbroken i missed it.
See the kind of shit I miss! I am not happy about my current location.
haha I just want to know where your underwear ended up. Did you hold it all night? put it in your pocket? leave it for someone to collect as a DC souvenir?
I kind of have a giant crush on all of you.
Again. Why can’t I live by yall! Dammit.
count me as one of the flashees. Though your cooter still had panties on at that particular flashing. I’m guessing the rugburn occurred after I curled up in a nice lil’ ball on your couch and passed out.
It was an awesome time! thanks, LiLu!
Ha. Classic pic.
hey i dont swing that way or anything but those are some nice headlights on that car.
Whitesnake is almost as cool as cheap trick. Almost.
Aw dude, it’s just not a night till someone’s cooch has been flashed and you’ve ridden one of your friends. You never let me down!
And this is only a small glimpse into your weekend? Oh my.
There was a point on Saturday when I stopped being able to create new memories. My brain drowned or broke or something.
Speaking of rugburn, why did my other half Tarable send me a text on Saturday AM that said “Why do I have rug burn on my face right now?”
My response: “Dont you think I should be the one asking that question to you?”
Er?
LMAO, classy, classy! : )
Blondie: I think I’ll be in those parts come February, actually…
FoggyDew: Sadly enough, I’m pretty sure this happened BEFORE you got there.
drollgirl: Eh. When you’re me, you kind of get used to it.
Caroline: I’m sorry about that! The problem has since been fixed… missed you to!
Fearless: You are not alone… I am here with you… though we’re far apart…
Wearing Mascara: Next time, my lovely!
Always a Bridesmaid: You had to go there, didn’t you? I believe I had the presence of mind to kick it under a dresser…
Deutlich: If priceless means horrified… then yes. Yes I was.
Alice: BOSS, no less! We are such klassy ladies…
inkpuddle: You know what? Neither do I. And I love it.
Jules: I knew you’d appreciate.
Alanna: Epic is right! “Delicious chaos” is how I’ve been referring to it.
JudgeyGirl: Oh darlin, me too. You need to come to one of these!
Sweet Caroline: But I feel like twat has a bit of a negative connotation… Maxie only refers to my girly bits with love.
Shangrila: You definitely don’t want to lose your cooch!
Del-V: We try.
Mike: If you can keep up…
HannahBlue: They are GOOD friends. Thank goodness.
Kendall: See you next June, darlin. Start hydrating now.
Marie: Yes. Yes it is. So glad you came, love!
[F]oxymoron: We’ve been called worse.
verybadcat: It was amazing. I can’t lie.
moooooog35: Can you name is “Klassy”? Thanks.
singlegirl: Oh, you KNOW it will. I will text you the moment it first saves my heiny.
Kim: Ain’t no other way to be.
brookem: Um. Details? Also, FOUR WEEKS!!!
surviving myself: Oh, my too. The 80s own my iPod, for reals.
thebmt: I wish I had a video instead of stills. It was pretty priceless.
Vittoria: Likewise, my dear. I promise there shall be more…
justjp: Well, hurry up and fix it! Sheesh.
Sarah, TNG: I am offering a $50 reward…
Hillary: The feeling is mutual, my dear.
Briana: Move already!
pithycomments: At least I was wearing my cute little heart panties. Yanno, until I wasn’t.
peterdewolf: My grandkids will be so proud someday.
Fizzgig: Thank you. From both of us. (Me and my headlights.)
Veggie Assassin: I always knew she’d be the top, too.
Nilsa: You should see the rest of the pictures…
f.B: C) All of the above.
WickedCourtni: I LOVE YOU *throws panties* Oh wait. I took them off already…
PorkStar: Wouldn’t have it any other way.
We need to party. Like Eddie Murphy styles.
“MY GIRL SHE LIKES TO PARTY ALL THE TIME PARTY ALL THE TIME PARTY ALL THE TIIIIIIMMMEE!”
I actually needed a car hood for some events that transpired this weekend. I wish I would have known that you double as one… I’ll remember next time.
this may be the best post of all time. it’s simply perfect. i heart you and your blog.
i’m putting you on my blogroll… how did i not have you on there??
OMG! Yes!
Too funny! Now I am especially sad I wasn’t there b/c my weekend was fairly boring…
I am going to pledge that this next weekend will NOT be. I will get drunk and stupid and have a blast! Heck maybe even tonight. Who says you shouldn’t drink on a Monday???
If you ladies ever pass through central BC, you’ve got a pad to crash at/person to trainwreck with. Officially.
ha!
how do I hang out with you guys…minus the no panties thing:)
What problem was it? A virus?
hahahaha i love it. you girls are hilarious.
Hey!! I’m sure you have a million but there is an award for ya on my blog! Don’t feel ya need to do something with it…but love your comments..so had to recognize!!!
Why am I always out of town when the cooch is being thrown around?
um. you’re wackyyy.
loves it.
we should play together sometime.
i think it’d be just swell.
kay, that is all.
Lilu man I didn’t know you and your possee rolled like that. Next time I’ll send you my happy knees to avoid the rug burn on the knees.
As a matter of fact the last time a women sat on my back she ended up falling down the stairs….don’t ask I don’t remember the whole scene…but the stairs just apppeared and she went down….lolololol.
Love Ya
JB
Is it wrong that that pic is going into the twinkle-stash?
And that is how me and my girls roll too
So it was a good night?
WickedCourtni: Can it be like Eddie Murphy from Coming to America?
JPP: You wouldn’t believe the shiz in my bag o’ tricks…
regardez moi: That’s the best news I’ve heard all day! Other than someone introducing me to the word “swunt”… think, as “swass” is to “swamp ass”…
Kellie: How was it? You make it into work today?
Meghan: We promise!!!
Hanako66: Don’t worry, I was the only de-pantied one, I believe.
Caroline: Not me, but someone on my blogroll- I commented on you.
Katelin: We try. No wait… no we don’t. This shiz just HAPPENS.
Lady Jane: Oh, yay! Heading over now, love!
JoLee: Yeah, dood. FIX THAT.
Amandaaa: I’m always down for a playdate. ALWAYS.
jb: “Happy knees”? I can’t wait to see this…
Muppet Soul: Not at all. It’s so, so right.
Miss_Nobody: Good to know there’s kindred spirits in the world
SSC – TDD: Hells. Yes.
You bet your sweet little ass it can be.
Versatility is a great thing to have it a drunk friend, Miss Car Hood.